Following a costly spell of mid-season maintenance brought on by unplayable conditions resembling a mud bath, Rochdale AFC’s pitch is now undergoing full renovation.
Written by lifelong Rochdale AFC supporter, season ticket holder, and stand-up poet Ian Aitchison, Muddy Hell is a new poem inspired by the club’s recent pitch troubles.
MUDDY HELL
This surely was some game from hell
With finale you couldn’t foretell
Abandoned you’ll know
With minutes to go
When the Dale were going swimmingly well!
Conditions were certainly dire
And sodden players started to tire
But what a real slog
To play in a bog
Once the pitch had turned into a mire!
I’m sure that the Southend fans knew
What drizzle they’d have to sit through
But now they’ve found out
If they were in doubt
That ‘Grim up North’ has to be true!
One defender was stuck by the flag
Waving arms in the air through the clag
Were those flailing hands
To whip up the fans?
“It’s backstroke I think”, yelled a wag
Southend should have found it a breeze
When water was up to their knees
The Shrimpers, you see
Are Southend-on-Sea
And should handle water with ease!
OK it was soggy indeed
And the ref said they couldn’t proceed
But no need to state
Our fans were irate
When we were 2-1 in the lead!
But Rochdale did show they’re world beaters
And set a world record to treat us
Cos our second goal
Amazed one and all
That knee slide was 25 metres!
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